Hey Jude

I've been following a story about a wealthy New Yorker named Gigi Jordan who allegedly murdered her eight-year-old son, Jude.  Apparently, Ms. Jordan fed her child Ambien and Xanax causing the youngster to die of an overdose.  When police found Ms. Jordan in a posh Manhattan hotel, she was said to be babbling incoherently, and, according to paramedics, near death herself.

Later on it was revealed that Jude was severely autistic.

Public opinion was swift and predictable, people were calling her a murderer and a monster.  Comments on websites were ablaze with finger pointing and cheap shots.  And while I understand the outrage (how can one not?) - it is clear that those screaming the loudest, have no idea what it's like to deal with a severly autistic child, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

If you know me, you know that I work in human services, and as such, I see, first hand, the toll that raising a child with special needs takes on a family.  Of course, not every case is horror-story; but many of them are.

I've met mother's of autistic children who are physically and mentally bruised due to the daily challenges they face.  I've sat with grown men who have openly wept in frustration over the realization that no matter what they do, their child will never reach a functional level.  I've dealt with parent's well into their 60's who have to figure out who will care for their child once they are no longer able to do this.  I've seen single mothers get screwed over by insurance companies who will not pay for even the most basic needs for their child.  I've listened to parents tell me that they've exhausted their personal savings to pay for therapies and treatment's for their child.  I've met siblings of disabled children who feel cheated over the fact that their parent's must expend most of their time and energies on the sibling who is disabled, leaving the non disabled child as an after thought...

One time, a mother of a twenty-two year old, severely autistic adult said to me, "I sometimes wonder if he would  be better off dead".  I shuddered when she said this, and then looked around her living room where I was sitting, at the holes punched in the wall by her son, at the sofa cushions that were torn apart by her son, at the pile of unpaid bills stacked on the coffee table in front of me as she had to quit her job and stay home with her son.  I did not say anything back to her, she needed to vent, and I hoped that by getting this off her chest, she'd never act upon it - of course she wouldn't. Eventually, we got her son placed in a group home, but it took a very long time; and before he was placed, the woman suffered a heart attack.  Sadly, it took that turn events to get things rolling beyond a snail's pace.

Getting back to Gigi Jordan's situation; I've always chalked up the cases  I deal with to the fact that the families on my case load are mostly,  blue collar.  I think that if they had the resources, they could cope.  But looking at Jordan - she was a woman of means, she had money and connections - and still she could not find the help that her son needed.  What's wrong with this picture?  When a mother who can afford everything her child needs, still feels so hopeless that the only way out is to kill her child - what lesson are we to take away from this tragedy?

I have no answers on this one, none at all. 

You can read about Jordan HERE and HERE.

Fave Foto Friday: Life Magazine Portraits

* the following photos where found on the net and are all supposed to be portraits from Life Magazine - I do not hold the copyright to any of these, nor am I am making any money from showing them - OK?

Here's my hero, Groucho Marx surrounded by a gaggle of gams while looking for a needle in haystack, or maybe an ant on the lawn.

Lucille Ball, the Queen of Comedy and a fire-breathing dragon, or so I have heard.

The Chairman of the Board meets the King of Sunday Night - Frank Sinatra and Ed Sullivan.

Good night, and good luck: Edward R. Murrow...take heed, kids, this is what a real journalist looked like. 

 And finally, Here's Milton Berle - jeez, people sure did smoke a lot back in the day.

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Finally, here is our Miss Magnolia in her ill-fated Broadway comeback in 1941's I Am Madam Satan.  With a cost of over ten million to mount this epic, the backers lost their shirts when the show closed down after only two performances.

The Winter of My Content

I already miss the snow.

I miss the gentle beauty it brought to the landscape.

I miss how it accentuated the holiday season...

 ...how it made the sides of buildings look like they were festooned with teeth from a crystal dragon.

I miss how the sun made dramatic shadows.

I already miss the way it made me look at things

I especially miss how it made the night transform into something magical.

And while all good thing must come to an end...

I'd like to forgo the next few months of dreary, rainy weather,

and wake up when summer is in full bloom.

* all pics by yours truly

Uncle Pax's Almanac: 02/21/10

Good Morning from Utopia New Jersey, where we find the snow-pack slowly melting away as we brace for several days of soaking rains.  I'd prefer more snow, but you can't change the weather, so there is no reason to complain.

Today in 1956, Elvis Presley had his first number one hit in America, Heartbreak Hotel.

If you are feeling like the Father of Your Country, and it's your birthday today, cross the Delaware, because you share the date with George Washington.

And today's quote comes from the first president: "Associate with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation; for it is better to be alone than in bad company. "

Today's obscure term is "Fire Extinguisher".  It was used primarily in the 1920's and has nothing to do with putting down some flames - do you have any idea what it meant? 

Here's wishing you all a productive, peaceful day.

Fave Foto Friday: Small Town Edition

Eagle eyed readers will notice that this photo is being used in the header of the blog.  It's a picture of Main Street in Maple Shade New Jersey, the sky was just gorgeous when I shot this last Sunday.  I balanced the camera on the roof of my car, and you can see the reflection of the sky on the car's hood.  That steeple in the back ground is Our Lady of Perpetual Help church (or as the locals call it, "Old Ladies Prison Home"), my uncle was the sexton there up until the day he died several years ago.

We Are the Rich, We Are The Famous - or - A Man of a Certain Age Watches "We are the World 25"

So, I recently watched the video to We Are the World 25 - a remake of the classic, We Are The World. Remember that old chestnut; a group of egos singers crowded together and sang a treacly melody, the profits of which, were used to assist the famine victims in Africa.

This time the egos have landed again singing to benefit those affected by the earthquake in Haiti.

Yeah, yeah, I know a good cause.

OK, so the first thing that bothers me is Jamie Foxx using the word "amazing" when introducing the song. You know me, I hate the overuse of that damn adjective - so there's that.

Anyway the song kicks off and here is this little boy singing, who is he? Why is he opening up the song? Is he a star? Was there a rider in Michael Jackson's will indicating that if anyone ever redid this song, a prepubescent child would have to sing it? Whatever, he was awful.

Then a a bunch of other people start singing, I did not recognize half of them. Eventually, Barbara Streisand shows up - she sings her line, does not even break a sweat, and for a split second, the younger generation is shown how it is done.

Celine Dion is there as well, she looks like she's in pain. Her voice makes my ears bleed.

Pink sounds good. Long live Pink.

A couple of these guys are using vocoders, WTF? Are their voices that weak they need to use studio trickery? Oh wait a second, of course they do, what was I thinking.

Wyclef Jean is singing in Haiti's native tongue, which is, as I understand it, a combination of Creole and French. Good for him, but he sounds like he's yodeling. His singing gives me a headache.

They also added a bunch of new verses to this song, as if the original wasn't dreadful enough.

When we finally see a group shot, I notice Gladys Knight and Brian Wilson in the crowd. Excuse me? One of the greatest soul singers of all time, and one of the geniuses of rock, and neither got a solo? Who did they have to step aside for, T Pain?

I gagged when Jamie Foxx started doing his lousy imitation of Ray Charles.

There was a lot more, most of it pretty lame.

Look, I hope this stunt raises a ton of money for the folks in Haiti, and if you have not already, please send some money, but as for the video and song, you would do better sticking red hot pokers in your ears - the effect will be startlingly similar.

Uncle Pax's Almanac: President's Day 2010

Happy President's Day from Utopia, New Jersey.  It's a sunny morning here, though we are due some more snow this afternoon and evening, probably not much, and certainly not as much as we saw last week. But, as I always say, I'll take snow over rain any day!

On today's date in 1879, U.S. President Hayes signed a bill that allowed female attorneys to argue cases before the U.S. Supreme Court.

Chances are you enjoy questioning the status quo if today is your birthday because you share the date with Galileo Galilei.

Today's quote is one of those unvarnished truths, spoken by ex President, Jimmy Carter," Republicans are men of narrow vision, who are afraid of the future."

Today's obscure term is food related, do you know what "Adam and Eve on a raft, and wreck 'em" is?

Here's wishing you a presidential day free of wrecked rafts.

Saint Valentine

While we are busy with candy, hearts and flowers today, celebrating Valentine's day - I've always been interested in exactly why February 14th was designated as a day to commemorate love.

I went back to a posting I did on this very blog on February 13th, 2005, and found  the following:

I was talking to a friend on the phone yesterday. He works for UPS and told me that they (the UPS drivers) refer to Valentine’s Day as “Little Christmas”; that is because it is the second busiest time of the year for them for delivering parcels.

We talked about the roses and candy that are bestowed upon objects of desire and wondered to each other how this day came to be. He said to me the he understood that Saint Valentine was a Catholic martyr who may have had his tongue removed and was later beheaded.

“Imagine that”, I added, “This year show your Valentine how much you love them by cutting your tongue out!”

“Wait”, he added, “Show them you REALLY love them by having your head removed and sent to your lover amidst a bouquet of blood red roses!”

We laughed at this Stephen King moment and continued getting more disgusting with our ideas for real Valentine’s gifts.

Later on I went on-line and read a little bit about the history of Valentine’s Day (and here’s an aside, does anyone recall when it WAS known as Saint Valentine’s Day?). There is all kinds of interesting stuff out there about the day including various tales of Saint Valentine. He may have been a priest who, while in jail, defied a Roman Emperor and continued marrying young couples. Said young lovers, would send him their wishes written on flower petals and leaves (hence the ritual of “Sending Valentine’s”). Most of the stories about him do indicate that he was killed, but I could not find anything about him having his tongue removed.

Interestingly, the holiday seems to be for the birds; that is, there was a common held belief in Europe that birds chose their mates on the 14th of February, so why not people?

Fascinating, from beheaded holy men to mating birds, today we set aside a day that the card makers and candy pushers make a bundle on; all in the name of love.

Well, no matter how you are spending the day, here's wishing you a wonderful Saint Valentine's Day! 

Through an Icicle

So I come across this pretty impressive icicle this morning on my balcony:

...and then I move in closer, and shoot it again...

...then I get right on top of it and see the world distorted...

...finally, I pull back for this one...

Fave Foto Friday: Arbus x 3

In a Diane Arbus mood this morning...

****

And From the House of Thunderpussy comes this shot of Magnolia and a gal pal trolling the snow choked streets of Philadelphia last week - though exactly what they were trolling for, we may never know.

Uncle Pax's Almanac: 02/11/10

A Good and Frosty Morning to all from Utopia where we survived yesterday's snow storm.  Totals might not have been as big as we were warned, but it still was a terrific snow event and supposedly, we've set some kind of record with the amount of snowfall we received this winter.   And this does not look like the end of it, no sir, more snow is being predicted for Monday.  We shall see!

On was on this date in 1916 when Feminist Icon, Emma Goldman was arrested for speaking out on birth control.

You are full of bright ideas if today's your birthday, because you share the date with Thomas Edison!

Today's obscure term is "back seat bingo" - do you know what that means?

Today's quote is from Christopher Isherwood who once said, "What irritates me is the bland way people go around saying, 'Oh, our attitude has changed. We don't dislike these people any more.' But by the strangest coincidence, they haven't taken away the injustice; the laws are still on the books."

Here's wishing you all a day full of good things and no injustices.

Night Blizzard...

Uncle Pax's Almanac: 02/10/10

Good Morning from Snowy Utopia, New Jersey.  Yes, we are currently in the midst of our third major snow of the winter season, and so far, this one is shaping up to be a real doozy! 

On today's date in 1982, Bismarck, ND, experienced its 45th consecutive day of subzero temperature readings which tied the previous record long string of subzero daily lows ending on the same date in 1937.

Take an extra lap if today's your Birthday - you can join Mark Spitz who was born on this date in 1950!

Obscure term of the day: "Got your glasses on".  Got an idea what that means?

Dorothy Parker gives us today's quote: "It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard."

Here's wishing you a day full of softly falling snow, and a lack of egg carrying bastards! 

Uncle Pax's Almanac: 02/09/2010

Good Morning From Utopia, New Jersey and Boy Howdy we are getting ready for  our second snow storm in less than three days...the weather service is calling for an additional foot of the white stuff on top of this past weekend's event.  As always, you'll hear no complaints about this development on my part: bring it on, sez I!

On today's date in 1989 , a winter storm continued to bring rain and snow to southern California. Snowfall totals ranged up to 18 inches at Olancha, with three inches at Palmdale.

If today is your birthday, and you feel like doing a little bump and grind, well that's becuase you share the date with the late, great, Ms. Gypsy Rose Lee!

Today's obscure term is "off time jive" - care to venture a guess as to what that describes?

And in honor of the upcoming blizzard, the following quote: Advice is like snow - the softer it falls, the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper in sinks into the mind. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge 

No matter what the weather, here's wishing you a day full of clear skies and smooth sailing! 

The Snowstorm of 2010 - The next day

I know that the further south you go, the higher the accumulation went; that said, after all of the bluster and brouhaha made by the weather talking heads,  I don't think this was that dramatic of a snowstorm.  Looks like a bit over a foot, and a lot of it is cleared off the roads...the picture above was shot late in the afternoon in Mount Laurel NJ.

Here's the view of the late, great Olga's in Marlton.  As you can see, routes 73 and 70 were pretty clear - a tad slushy, but no major shakes...

This is a picture of the old Farmer's Hall in Mount Laurel.  Click it to enlarge and you'll see how nifty the late winter sun looks highlighting the recently face-lifted old building...

Being the snow lover that I am, I  can't wait for the next alleged storm which is supposed to hit sometime on Tuesday and continue on in the day on Wednesday...if mother nature comes through, someone might have a six day weekend (snow day on Wednesday, vacation day on Thursday, furlough day on Friday, and Holiday on Monday)!